… there had been many times that I heard that very phrase of “she can do so much more if she tried harder”…”If only she applied herself , she has amazing potential”…and that’s how I “rolled” at school….
Many years have passed since those school years, and this morning I turned the page on my desktop calendar and it told me to:”aim higher” , “believe you can do it and you will…there’s so much potential in you , if only you believed”…
It is early in the morning and I mumble …. “easy for you to say..”…and as I wake up more and more to the new day, I begin to remember all those school teachers that said similar things to me in my distant past… I remember clearly that then, same as now, I stood confused asking out loud (mainly in my head), what it all meant… Haven’t I been putting enough effort into everything? and if more is required , what is that more? how does it look like?
So, this morning I am having similar inner discussions…aim higher…says the calendar on my desk … OK, I say back to it…I will but where too? I am still struggling to identify, that limiting belief that apparently keeps me aiming low…or that keeps me confused with regards the direction of my aim…
And here we have it…here’s my light bulb moment…all these year’s I haven’t been trying hard enough purely because I haven’t found my niche in life, my purpose… But as I make that thought , half of me retaliates and starts to argue.
Haven’t I worked hard enough? I ask. Haven’t I strived to get higher and haven’t I fought harder and harder each time an obstacle or block was put my way? How can you now tell me that I haven’t tried hard enough ? or that I haven’t aimed high enough? When I have tried my best to overcome? and here it is, have I solely been trying to overcome obstacles rather than paying attention to where “my arrow has been pointing”? Have I lost my purpose in my effort to fight and overcome obstacles?
Is this little message on my calendar, just asking me to release the wounds collected along the way?…those scars that made me build a wall around me that serves the purpose of keeping me safe, but on the other hand it also barricades me in…? Rather than telling me that I was aimless or with no purpose…
Release it shouts at me, release all that which is not helping you in order for you to position and aim that arrow higher…Release it tells me, release those limiting beliefs that you have “collected” along the way whilst fighting your battles for survival; release all that has made you believe that “this is as far as you can go”…
With all this in mind, I will keep pondering on that little statement on my calendar , “aim higher” … and see where that takes me!